Memories were stolen

Continuing response to removal of items from graves.

Dear Editor:

I just came from visiting my son’s grave at the Summerland Cemetery.  and I felt that I had been violated.  My son’s resting spot for the last 10 years had been vandalized.

Special mementoes that not only myself but his sisters and friends have placed to be close to Mark, so that when we visit, these small mementoes remind us of special memories that we have of him.

These memories have been stolen, as if our memories are meaningless and insignificant.

I buried my son here so that I could visit and remember the 16 years that I had with him.

Our cemetery looks cold, unvisited, as if it has been scorched to the very depths of the ground where my son lies.

When I go out to see my son, I could tell if he has had visitors or not by what notes or tokens they would leave.

I get a great feeling of warmth when I know other people still think of my son.

All I can think of now is how some stranger callously picked at my son’s grave with no feelings and easily discarded my memories.

Any given day you can walk by this cemetery and see how many people come out and visit their loved ones.

You can see how we not only tend to our own spot, but if we see flowers blown around, plants toppled over, we reach out and tidy it up.

I did read about the request to remove items, and I did go out and remove a pole I had stuck in the grass which was where I would attach balloons.

But the rest of my memories were lovingly placed on the grave itself.

My husband did find a couple of items discarded across the road from the cemetery, but a few items are gone forever, including his soccer ball that he loved.

I feel so empty, so betrayed by my town, and most of all, I feel that my son’s existence has been purposely erased.

I feel for everyone that has experienced this violation and I only hope that the powers to be that made this decision, never have to take their surviving child to visit their brother or sister and be told that they can’t leave a note or picture that they drew.

Marcia Vandermey



Just Posted

Living life to the fullest with Alzheimer’s – an Okanagan couple’s story

Stella Adams and Willi Brombach are making their way through the uncharted waters of Alzheimer’s

Summerland’s solar power array on schedule

Solar project nearing public consultation stage

Growth in many ways for Summerland

Looking back on 2018 and looking forward to 2019 with Mayor Toni Boot

Video: New Penticton studio is a playground for creative types

We toured Penticton’s newest creator space

Hang glider pilot rescued from Pincushion Mountain

Pilot was able to help guide rescue crews to her location

B.C. storm totals $37M in insured damages

The December storm wreaked havoc on B.C.’s south coast

Chiasson nets shootout winner as Oilers edge Canucks 3-2

Edmonton moves one point ahead of Vancouver

B.C. chief says they didn’t give up rights for gas pipeline to be built

Hereditary chief: no elected band council or Crown authority has jurisdiction over Wet’suwet’en land

Condo rental bans may be on way out with B.C. empty home tax

Many exemptions to tax, but annual declarations required

UPDATE: B.C. boy, aunt missing for three days

The pair are missing from Kamloops

Daredevil changes game plan to jump broken White Rock pier

Brooke Colby tells council daredevil event would help boost waterfront business

Liberal bows out of byelection after singling out Jagmeet Singh’s race

Karen Wang says she made comments online that referenced Singh’s cultural background

Truck hauling compressed gas for ‘virtual pipeline’ crashes on B.C. highway

Driver charged and highway closed for nine hours - containers did not rupture

Most Read