For many, myself included dealing with change is very difficult.
It’s easy to stay within your little bubble where everything is calculated to your liking and nothing is unexpected or out of the ordinary.
I wish I was writing to tell you how you can live like this and avoid change at all costs, but the reality is, things are always changing and there’s nothing you can do to stop it!
As a child, I remember when my mom told me that we were moving to a new house, I was devastated and all rational thought went out the window. It didn’t matter that the new house was much bigger and had a swimming pool, in my mind nothing could be better than my home with my playhouse.
Despite all my efforts, I couldn’t convince my parents to stay and we ended up moving.
As expected, once I was settled in, all my reservations about the new house dissolved and it became the place where I felt most at ease. 13 years later, I learned that we were moving again and the previous feelings came rushing back.
Even though I had gone through that type of change, it didn’t mean that I had gotten used to it.
Instead of getting used to change, it is important to just acknowledge and accept it.
At first, it feels uncomfortable, but you adapt, it becomes your new comfort zone and you start to forget what it was like before the change.
In the library we have many books on learning how to cope with all different kinds of changes in your life, and how to use them to your advantage. “Managing Transitions: Making the Most of Change” by William Bridges, PhD and “Who Moved My Cheese? An Amazing Way to Deal with Change in Your Work and in Your Life” by Spencer Johnson are two books that I highly recommend for general change.
There are also books for specific types of change such as “The Grief Club: The Secret to Getting through All Kinds of Change” by Melody Beattie which focuses on change through loss, whether it is divorce, death or drug addiction.
Sometimes, we need to learn when change is necessary in our lives and how we can initiate it. When change is within your control, it can be harder than dealing with unavoidable change because you have the ability to procrastinate or you just don’t know where to begin.
It can all be overwhelming but you can find a multitude of books on what types of changes need to be made to achieve your goals and where you can start.
If this is something that interests you, I suggest looking into “Switch: How to Change things when Change is Hard” by Chip Heath and “When Everything Changes, Change Everything: In a Time of Turmoil, A Pathway to Peace” by Neal Donald Walsch.
There are also books about being afraid of change and learning how to deal with it for children.
One series that comes to mind is the “Scaredy Squirrel” series by Melanie Watt. In this series, Scaredy Squirrel goes through many scary situations that are relatable to children, such as planning a party that takes an unfortunate turn, being alone in the dark and the frightening process of making new friends.
I would suggest this series to any parent wanting to open the lines of communication with their child about change and what makes them afraid.
Keep in mind what author Jim Rohn once said, “Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by change.”
Kayley Robb is an Assistant Community Librarian at the Summerland Branch of the Okanagan Regional Library.